The High Five
7:53 am
Mon July 29, 2013

Big D Vs. H-Town: 5 Reasons Why Dallas Rules

Today, there’s only one story that has North Texas (and the Gulf Coast) talking. In this Very Special Episode of the High Five, we dig into the “rivalry” between Dallas and Houston. (Which we suspect is more of a rivalry in Houston than it is in Dallas. Zing!)

Tim Rogers, editor of D Magazine, and the editorial director of Houstonia Magazine, Scott Vogel,  faced off on the Bayou City’s public radio station, KUHF. This friction on the talk show Houston Matters is fueled by Houstonia’s assertion that the rivalry is over and Houston has “won.” But we North Texans say, not so fast. Here are 5 Reasons Why Big D Rules.

  • It's the state fair to end all state fairs, and Dallas is the host.
    It's the state fair to end all state fairs, and Dallas is the host.
    Credit Collin Harvey / Flickr

    It’s Called The State Fair of Texas, Ever Heard Of It?: Usually a state doesn’t choose its second-best location to host its most boisterous, colorful, characteristic annual event. The State Fair has been cozily settled at Fair Park since 1886. Cotton Bowl matchups like the Red River Rivalry, a midway buzzing with rides and games, and culinary masterpieces like the Fried Bacon Cinnamon Roll and the Picnic on a Stick make this event one-of-a-kind. Just to reiterate, its one-of-a-kind city backdrop is Dallas. And Big Tex, the icon who burst into flames last year, can’t be kept down for long. He’ll be back in action on Sept. 27. In Dallas. Not Houston.

  • Would You Rather Be An Alpha Or A Beta?: Silly question, right? But folks in Dallas are living the answer. The Globalization and World Cities Research Network categorizes cities on a global scale once every few years. The last time researchers made the list, Dallas was in the Alpha-minus category while Houston was classified as Beta-plus. Alpha cities are defined as “very important world cities that link major economic regions and states into the world economy.” Beta cities are “important world cities that are instrumental in linking their region or state into the world economy.” Kind of the same, right? Just subtract the words “very” and “major” and sub in “region.” As an Alpha city, Dallas is in impressive company: London, Paris, New York, Sydney. But hey, the Beta category has its own standouts. Houston rubs elbows with St. Louis, Perth and bustling metropolis that is Bratislava (the capital of Slovakia, of course.)
  • Hockey Realities, Not Hockey Dreams: Craig Cohen, the KUHF host who'll moderate today's debate, moved to Houston from the Midwest and recently wrote a blog post chronicling his 10 favorite things about Houston. His tongue-in-cheek #2 favorite was hockey. In his own words “Who knew Houston was a hockey hotbed? Not the NHL, apparently, who should absolutely put a franchise here, and take advantage of the hordes of fans that would attend games, supporting a highly successful franchise in the 4th largest city in America, and…okay, okay, I admit it. This is not a hockey town. (sigh).” Well Craig, good news! If we can just tempt you a few hours north, you can embrace a real, live, NHL team, and a Stanley Cup-winning franchise at that. So we’re counting the Stars’ actual existence as opposed to the wish-and-hope approach in Houston as one for the win column.
  • A Super Bowl ring for each finger on your right hand? Not bad Dallas, not bad.
    A Super Bowl ring for each finger on your right hand? Not bad Dallas, not bad.
    Credit dbkfrog / Flickr
    And Speaking Of Trophies... Okay, the Rockets may have just snagged Dwight Howard out of Mark Cuban's clutches, but if we’re counting championship trophies, Dallas gets the ... well ... trophy. The Rockets’ two titles edge the Mavs’ one, but thanks to the Cowboys, the overall contest isn’t even close. America’s team has five Super Bowl rings to brag about. The Houston Oilers never won the big game (sorry, two AFL titles don’t count), and the Houston Texans haven’t made it past the playoffs. The Astros and Rangers tie at zero for World Series titles (but that could’ve been such a different story in 2011, drat!). The Stars’ 1999 Stanley Cup is the cherry on top our championship sundae. So trophy-wise, the final score is Dallas 7, Houston 2; a comfortable victory for Big D.
  • Wickedly Witty Citizens: For snark’s sake, we asked North Texans to submit their own analogies that compare Houston to Dallas. We gave them a jumping off place (Houston is to Dallas as Jan Brady is to Marsha) and let them take it from there. Here are some of our favorites: Nicole LeBlanc says "Houston/Dallas = no zoning/zoning." Perhaps somewhat critically, Sarah Duckers responds, "Houston: Howdy. Dallas: Where'd you go to school?" KERA commentator Rawlins Gilliland had a couple of gems: "Dallas/Houston = Marilyn Monroe/Anna Nicole Smith" or "Paris France/Paris Hilton." The Facebook thread’s still open, so don’t be shy! 
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